(I’d pick big, heart-shaped muscles over skinny any day.)
For those of you who lovelovelove find posts about my life-minutiae interesting this mightcould be your dream post.
For those of you who kinda dont give a shit prefer more informative, motivating missives* you may want to click away in a hurry before the navel-gazing commences.
Are both of you ready? Settled in with a high-protein snack & some water? Let’s go!
I wanna preface this all with the fact we had an amazing fabulous holiday vacation (vaycay for the Tornado from Kindergarten at least. why do we adults always have work to do?!).
The plan had been to travel, said plan was derailed by ear infections, and the result was lots and lots of much needed family time.
(here’s where I skip to the end of the story & then back to the start. here’s where we realize I may never be a fiction writer of a traditional genre)
One facet of vacation/no school I adored was our morning-time together: Ren Man typically slept in** and the Tornado & I holed up in my office, cuddled & chitchatted.
(Here’s a photo of my office wall mural. It’s definitely less an officeoffice and more cuddle/connect-central:)
One morning she wriggled up close behind me, commenced rubbing my back and said:
Mama your body feels beautiful. It feels skinny not like mine.
(Ill give you a moment for that to sink in. Im choosing to believe it throws everyone for a sadloop as it did me.)
I’m pretty confident long-term blog readers (and those who read the blog before this one) can imagine precisely how the conversation unfolded from here.
We talked about strength, power, and the amazing things our bodies can do.
We chatted about how beautifulbeautifulBEAUTIFUL she is from her kindlovingsillyspirit to her chocolately brown eyes.
(disclosure: when we hit that second part she quickly agreed and said: yeah that’s what I thought about me.)
And I wont lie to you: I blamed her peers. I assumed they’d already begun planting the insidious seed of SKINNY = BETTER and THIN = PRETTY.
And I wont lie to you: I blamed the Husband who’d recently brought a scale/bodyfat analyzer into the house.***
And I wont lie to you: I in no way, shape or form placed any of the blame upon my own shoulders— where it turned out all said blame belonged.
You see, we’ve been struggling with some, uh, digestive issues lately with the Tornado.
Without venturing too deep into TMI-territory Ive been even more vigilant than usual with her foodstuffs. Ive focused on fiber. Ive obsessed noticed she’s been offered more junk than usual & tried to *always* counteroffer with healthy options.
And yet, while I pridefully thought of myself as Digestive Tract Fixing Mother of the Year, Id completely and utterly dropped the ball on another form of junk: MIND CANDY.
It would never enter my mind to say:
It’s vacation! let’s fill your belly with fast food & various & sundry nutritional wastelands!! it’s treat time! forget what we normally do!!!
Yet Id done exactly that for her brain all in the name of you’re not feeling well—here’s a TREAT!
It was only after ranting at the Husband he needed to put!that!shower!stepthing!away! (oops.) I finally realized what sparked the comment.
The sentiment came from a “treat” I’d given to her and then tuned out while she devoured:****
Whether it was a result of VACATIONitis or merely my slacking off as a parent I fed her junk Id normally not and the repercussions were tremendous.
Not irreparable, thank goodness, but definitely left a mark.
On me if not on her.
I pride myself on watching her consumption not only of junkfood but of JUNK for her brain.
Im grateful this was just a small reminder & was humbled by the fact I dropped the ball and immediately looked to place the ‘blame’ elsewhere.
Which all brings me to the end of my unplanned PSA & to my question for you & your wisdom:
If you have children do you monitor their mind junk as well as their junk food intake?
As an adult, do you find you’re happier & healthier the less brain candy YOU consume?
*missive isnt the correct word, I know. I just love me some alliteration.
**can you call 6a sleeping in? let’s call it that for blogpost purposes…
***said procurement was via a blog pitch. I turned it down & Ren Man said he was curious/would review.
****Monte Carlo is not necessarily a bad movie, but it is IMO too adult for a 6 year old.
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