(My ass’ new BFF)
Ahh People.
I laugh.
Id completely and totally gifted myself this blogpost to whine, b*tch, kvetch & moan.
I was pumped.
I was excited!
I was ready to unload & be all!about!me!!
Until I sat down and plopped fingers to keyboard.
What did my dearth of words cause me to (re)learn about myself? (thanks for asking)
Im not a very good whiner.
For each lament I almost typed I innately, instinctively, found the silver lining.
What started out as a planned complaint session with comments closed (you know, lest anyone tried to cheer or perk me up & all) transformed into the bullets below.
Mainly minus the whine and more an update of sorts.
(my apologies to all of you who’ve listened to my whines lately. please to know you’re probably the reason I was able to silver-lining focus up in herre. and, again, THANK YOU. please to out yourselves?)
I am 100% officially out of the race in Vegas. It’s funny. I was shocked how many of *you* were shocked when I shared this fact on Twitter. I’d really thought I’d whined up a STORM in these posts. What started as back ‘tightness’ seems to have *really* originated in my glute-area (hence the photo above).
Ten weeks no running later plus the fact I cant walk a mile let alone 13.1 equals no race for me.I’m 99.9% certain Im not traveling to Vegas (I like to leave things open for a miracle. you never know!) Im already out race-fees & am not able to incur flight, hotel, food & childcare for an event Im not doing.
In addition, Im sad. I wish I could be out there running. As much as Id like to say Im woman enough to spend money I dont have to come and cheer everyone on—Im not. Im woman enough to realize that some of my sadness stems from lack of sleep (for a while the pain was keeping the slumber as well as the exercise at bay) which leads me to…
Im indeed Silverlining McGee. Making it to age 40 without ever being injured & having this all suddenly tossed my way** has caused me to realize a few things. First,
Im not addicted to exercise. Id always surmised this. Id definitely professed this. Ive learned it is true. Next,
I am resourceful. When I lose one form of stress-reduction instead of wallowing I find another (Hello meditation!). Lastly, this derailment might just be what I needed to discover my love of the run.
Now that I absolutely can not run—Ive found I long to. That would be a fab silver lining in this misfit’s mind.
I am all about the family. As with the shocking(not) realization Im not an exercise addict this one is more a happy finding out I am what I thought I was (does that even make sense? it does to me).
Giving up running/the race in Vegas has been nothing compared to sitting and watching my daughter play instead of participating. Missing out on the half-marathon is nothing compared to telling her ‘mommy is going to sit on the bench and watch you play‘ or (even worse to me) telling her NO! to the playground & opting for a more sedentary playplace. The word
heartbreaking comes immediately to mind.
So that’s where I leave you on this Friday.
AssRolling.
ArseSITTING.
Exercise-longing.
Vegas-missing.
And.
Scene.
**my injury (if we wanna call it that) was NOT caused by exercise at all. welcome to age 41 I guess…
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