I learned. She helped.Once upon a time, I was offered an AMAZING OPPORTUNITY.
I couldnt believe it.
I was excited.
I looked at my stack of post-its fancy formalized mapped out schedule and deduced I could not say yes.
I was committed (kids stuff). I was busy with deadlines (work stuff). I could not fit another thing in.
I remember sharing the above my husband and his responding:
You should never be so busy you’re incapable of adding another thing. You need to build in space so if a cool opportunity arises you can say yes.
I knew he was right when he said it.
I made the opportunity work—but not without significant juggling.
I knew he was right when he said it—-yet for some reason his phrasing didnt spark an AH HA! moment.
Flash forward a few years (ahhh MizFit. will you really be 6 next month?!) & I found myself in the same position:
Impending move
Stressed out child who needed more FOCUSED her-time with a PRESENT mama.
Work deadlines.
I was backed into a corner as the phrase goes. I assumed this was simply how life was was meant to be.
I had lolloped along at an ok pace until we were forced to uproot and move life threw extra stuffs my way and I became immediately overwhelmed.
A wise, wise friend remarked to me:
You need to learn to leave margins.
I needed margins.
That was my AH HA! moment.
That was the phrasing which resonated with me as I already knew I tended to fill spaces.
Literally (we’ve chatted about my clutter problem) and metaphorically (it took an entire masters program with a counseling base for me to learn to SIT WITH SILENCE).
MARGINS, as a writer, was phrasing I understood.
It immediately brought to mind how, as a child, Id write stories on unlined paper and have nary a white spec left by the end.
My friend was right.
I needed to leave virtual margins in my life. I needed a SPACE between my load and my life. My life demanded a GAP between my load and my breaking point.My husband had said essentially the same thing years prior, but as with so much in life, I needed wording which clicked with me to FINALLY get it.
And get it I did.
Since we’ve touched down in Oakland Ive committed to looking forward /not obsessively checking my rear view mirror.
Im also committing to living life INSIDE THE LINES (admittedly a bizarre notion for me).
Im drawing margins in Sharpie (just like my boundaries) & building myself a cushion between living and overload.
Im treating my life PRECISELY like I view fitness (what took me so long?!):
Im doing LESS than I am capable of each day so I can greet the *next* 24 hours with joy, excitement, ability and SPACE to do more.
And you?
Am I the last to grasp the notion of life needing margins?How do you maintain SPACE or MARGINS in your life?
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