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Thursday, August 8, 2013

Wednesday Weigh In: Knowing What You Need When You Need It

WHAT a morning! I was hoping to get this post up super early before leaving for the gym but I woke up to the find my little copyrighted photo drama not really over as I thought it was.

I ended up coming home from my workout and writing copyright infringement letters to the owners of a .au domain that’s using my before and after photos to sell some diet pill and colon cleanse.

FABULOUS! Right?

Ugh. To make matters worse, I’ve just been a funk lately, which is why I didn’t get on the scale this morning. I thought about it and consciously decided the number (regardless of what it is/was) would do more harm than good today.

20130529_weighin

And that’s what I wanted to talk about for this week’s weigh in: Knowing What You Need When You Need It

There are weeks I need to see the number. I need to be held accountable. I need the feedback.

There are other weeks where my mental state doesn’t warrant dealing with the scale. “Good” or “bad” wouldn’t matter, I just don’t want to bother with it and no, it’s not coming from a place of denial. I’m not binging myself to death or eating out my frustration, but the feelings have been there.

No, this is about being true and honest with myself, and for the past couple of days, for whatever reason, I’ve needed to walk away. I eased up on keeping my food journal. I haven’t run. I didn’t even put my Fitbit on this morning!

Maybe it’s hormones or stress or tiredness. Maybe it’s all three. Who knows? To be honest, I don’t want to psychoanalyze myself. I just needed a break, and you know what? I’m already starting to feel better.

Learning how to honestly listen to what I need without guilt or stress or anger is probably the hardest part of this journey. There was a time I would have called myself weak or lazy for admitting I needed a break. There was a time I would have binged to help deal with these feelings.  There was definitely a time (not that long ago) that I would feel an enormous sense of guilt.

Now I simply try to treat myself the way I would a friend, and sometimes you tell your friend, “Hey, take a few days. You deserve it.”

So how was everyone else’s week? I hope better than mine! :)


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