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Saturday, December 7, 2013

Accidental goal achievement.

20130304 155148 Accidental goal achievement. these feet were made fer walkin’!

Years ago.

Many.

Perhaps around twenty?

I had a conversation with my then-boyfriend/now-husband:

I long to be the individual people look at and wonder: Does she own a car? I always see her on her bike! Seriously. Does she own a car?!

I dont even know precisely why I longed for this (remnants of college Grateful Dead loving days? a sense of wanting the freedom I surmised a bike-only misfit would feel?) –but I did.

There simply seemed to exist a spontaneity in that girl I wanted to experience and which I did not possess.

I was also self-aware enough–even then–to realize this would never happen.

It wasnt so much I loved my car/cars in general (oh how I did not).

It wasnt the fact I didnt need/want the exercise (biking places seemed an easy way to fit in fitness).

I just knew myself.

Even then.

The conversations would always end with:

…and I guess part of maturing is realizing when something you WANT to be a piece of your self-definition really will never be reality. That bike-women sounds free-spirited & interesting yet that will never be me.

I recognized it was fantasy I needed to let go of.

And shed I did.

Id completely forgotten those youthful-conversations until recently, too.

Flash forward to life *today* in Oakland.

After flashing back to my broken window experiences.

Oh, and flashing sideways to how having a pedometer has changed my life and made me a better mother.

(Annnnnnd do the *sprinkler* as you dash UPSTAIRS because youre not allowed to pee on the first floor these days…)

The lens through which I view Oakland-living has done a 180 by virtue of the fact I’ve chosen to view it as a walking community.

It’s not really.

It’s a kind of a haul to my coffee-shop office.

I can only grab a few items at the grocery as the l-o-n-g walk back + said items on my back = awkward-cumbersome.

Yet I’ve chosen to view my ‘hood through the WALKING LENS none the less.

282350 10151487324514466 610444237 n 300x206 Accidental goal achievement. go carla go!

Recently a neighbor I dont know approached me and asked:

Do you own a car? We see you walking everywhere and wondered.

Over the course of the next few weeks I *other* strangers/neighbors/new friends made similar comments.

Do you and your husband share one car?  I see you walking all the time–did you sell your car before you moved?

It was during those interactions it dawned on me I’d achieved a life-goal without noticing.

20131120 111100 Accidental goal achievement. rain or shine: Id become a walker!

Id done precisely what the ‘goal achieving gurus’ tell us not to do (Id taken my eyes completely off the prize!) and only after I let my goal go did I accidentally achieve it.

And, because I am indeed the consummate misfit, this accidental-success has bolstered my confidence in arenas where Im actively seeking successes.

I now think:

Well damn.  If I can transform myself into the girl no one thinks owns a car (!!) then why could I NOT _______, too?

It feels empowering & it feels amazing.

I feel unstoppable.

And you?

Have you ever been so busy LIVING youve not realized—either until someone points it out or with hindsight–youve achieved a goal?

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